Weather warnings are fast becoming something of a staple for Hollywood Cricket, and this year was no different. Long gone was the drumming rain and flash floods of 2025 and in its place a sun blazing with such ferocity that the start time for the match against UCLA had to be brought forwards in a bid to beat the Los Angeles heatwave. Undeterred, the XI arrived in dribs and drabs - from London, NYC, Sydney and the UCLA student halls - safe in the knowledge that captain Toppers had fixed the toss and Hollywood would be first in the field.
Inspired by Sir Don Bradman's north America tour of 1932, when the Australian side played against a team of expat Hollywood actors and film stars led by the inimitable C. Aubrey Smith, the UCLA campus provided a setting steeped in history for the game, and as the parasols went up around the boundary edge and the college band struck up the anticipation was palpable.
Adapting to conditions was going to be key and UCLA got off to a solid start, rotating the strike smartly with the odd boundary flourish along the way. The heat seemed to rise from the ground and weigh down the air, testing the fitness levels of the Hollywood bowlers who spurred each other on between heavy breaths, long run ups quickly becoming shorter. As the UCLA openers settled into their work and the boundaries began to flow more freely, though, it was clear it was going to take something special to swing the momentum Hollywood's way.
Right on cue it was Luke Flynn who stepped forwards - or rather backwards - to deliver, taking a stunning one handed catch on the boundary over his right shoulder, his timing seamlessly integrated with the UCLA big band's opening rendition of The Mighty Bruins. "Fight, fight, fight!" came the chorus, as Flynn took off around the boundary edge in celebration. "Fight, fight, fight!" The brass section filling the stadium with a wall of sound as the photographers' lenses and Flynn's gold tooth flashed in the morning sunshine.
The game was on.
Buoyed by Flynn's heroics, the Hollywood bowlers came charging in. Captain Topley leading from the front with an over that had UCLA swinging at fresh air, backed up well by Buggé, Travener, Bowden and man of the moment Flynn himself. Two excellent catches from fellow Aussie Alex Shore and the squeeze was on as Sykes, Westerhaut and Bowden exploited the turn and bounce on offer from the UCLA pitch. Where was Adam Zampa when you needed him?
As the momentum swung back Hollywood's way, wicketkeeper Severn produced another standout moment, leaping to his left to take a lifting delivery and releasing it in the same motion to remove the stranded UCLA batter. Topley and Buggé returned for the death overs, securing another wicket apiece, and spirits were high as Hollywood left the field having restricted UCLA to 132 from their 20 overs.
After a quick turnaround under the shade of the parasols, Lockhart and Hose strode out to open the batting for Hollywood as the temperature continued to rise. Meanwhile, talk in the dugout had moved to the relative merits of expat life in Los Angeles or New York. Back came Lockhart. Out strode Bowden. "East Village or uptown?" Important to age with grace, the group concluded. Back strode Bowden. Suddenly, things were not quite going to plan for Hollywood and all talk of restaurant openings in the West Village were quickly put on hold in a familiar scramble for pads and gloves.
Only fan favourite Ollie Sykes, held back by Topley to bat at eight, seemed unfazed. Moving into his twenty fourth consecutive hour awake on his West Coast adventure, he calmly surveyed the UCLA bowling attack from beneath the brim of a limited edition HC sun hat and heavy shades. The anticipation was palpable as the photographers snapped away, rumours already circulating on campus that the controversial Bring Me The Horizon front man would be playing.
Meanwhile, Hollywood wickets continued to tumble as Shore, Westerhaut and Flynn were all dismissed in quick succession. Hose batted well for his 23, ably accompanied by some swashbuckling strokes from Severn but when he was stumped attempting a suitably Hollywood strike down the ground it seemed the wheels might come off. Topley, though, was unfazed. Cool as ever in designer sunglasses and HC cap, he held a relaxed pose for the photographers patrolling the boundary edge, trump card still in hand.
The stage set, it was time for Topley to play his ace and for Hollywood's star man to enter stage left. Sykes dutifully sauntered out to the middle where he was eagerly greeted by Severn, who explained the match situation to the England Lions international at length before hitting one straight to cover and scampering a quick single to check that he was on his toes. As Sykes took guard, a hush descended in the crowd, with eager fans craning their eyes and some asking what had happened to the rocker's trademark tattoos, concealed under his long sleeved HC cricket shirt.
What followed can only be described as a moment of collective disbelief, as Hollywood's overseas star was promptly castled. Whether it was the heat of the day, lack of sleep or just the fast lifestyle for which he is famed finally catching up with him, we will never know. Sykes looked as bemused as everybody else. Stumps everywhere, UCLA wheeled off in celebration while confusion abounded in the crowd. Some may have come to see the 2024 Wisden Schoolboy Cricketer of the Year, others their favourite Sheffield rocker, but both camps commiserated as Sykes made his way slowly back to the pavilion.
The game all but gone, Topley searched for the XL pads. The last glimmer of hope for Hollywood perhaps his match winning heroics in the Hundred the previous summer. Despite some last ditch striking from the captain and fellow bowlers, though, with Sykes gone it proved too steep total for the tail to chase. When Topley was caught in the deep and Buggé fell attempting to send the ball off campus, Hollywood were finally dismissed with an over remaining having fallen thirty runs short.
In keeping with HC post-match tradition, the side decamped to a nearby watering hole, their cricket whites sparking bemused conversations with Sunday regulars at the local Barney's Beanery. Ever the ambassador, word reached Topley that Major League Cricket representatives had arrived enquiring about his whereabouts while Bring Me The Horizon fans continued to circle the campus in search of the elusive Ollie Sykes. Deciding that a longer stay at Barney's might be called for, food was ordered and with no Lockie Ferguson in the squad to keep tabs, pints slowly gave way to pina coladas, as the XI settled in to debrief on the day and wait for the heat to pass.
